Sunshine and Tinsel: A Canine Christmas Tail

I wrote a story/poem back in 2006 recounting an incident with the family dog when I was 4 years old. I gave copies to my family in their Christmas stockings that year. A couple of years after that when I was hosting 60 Degrees on East Village radio, I read it as part of my Holiday episode. Now it has been posted on the GoodMenProject website for this holiday season. I hope you enjoy it!

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‘Twas morning in the Ferrari house
two days Christmas past
Life was getting back
to normal at last

Mom’s in the kitchen
brewing a cup
Dad’s in the bathroom
shaving his scruff

I crept out of bed
little 4-year-old me
To revisit the presents
that Santa brought me

My sisters, still sleeping
they hadn’t a clue
Of the calamitous doings
about to ensue…

Our dog was named Sunshine
half beagle, at most
The other half basset hound:
Dumb as a post.

This brilliant young pup
found a holiday treat:
She thought that the tinsel
was something to eat

Soon she’d get queasy
lowered eyes to the floor
Rocking forward and backward
5 minutes or more

The “extended heave warning”
gave time to react
We’d all run for newspapers
or brown paper sacks

More often than not
we would catch her in time
Sparing our rugs
of the glittery slime

We’d gone all through Christmas
playing this game
But this morning was special
not more of the same

She had eaten more tinsel
It did not agree
There she stood: heaving
right under the tree

All of our presents
were still on display
Right where we’d opened them
on Christmas Day

I entered the room
and clearly could see
Sunshine’s next targeted
barf casualty:

My sister Jen’s brand new
Fisher Price Zoo
Was about to be covered
in silvery goo

I had to think fast:
What can I do?
I can’t let her spew
on the Animal Zoo!

I got on all fours
I crawled under the tree
Grabbed her by the collar
and led her towards me

It seemed like slow motion
but safety seemed near
I began to stand up
when I thought I was clear…

But I wasn’t.

Ornaments shattering
down came the tree
On the stomach-sick dog
and pajama-clad me

Out of the living room
there arose such a clatter
My family ran in to see
what was the matter

From under the tree
they heard screaming and crying
My mother envisioned me
bleeding or dying

Quick as a flash
my dad lifted the tree
I was curled in a ball
with the dog beside me

He started to scold me
as he always did
My mother said
“Come on! Lay off of the kid!”

Pine needles were scattered
broken bulbs, too
But I only sustained
a small scratch or two

The tree went back up
a few ornaments lighter
The rope that secured it
was fastened much tighter

My act of heroics
became quite a joke
To share with the relatives
and neighborhood folk

They would all laugh
I’d join in too
At the sacrifice made
for the Animal Zoo

With all the excitement
as best I recall…
The dog never did
get sick after all!

See Also:
Truman Capote’s Christmas Memory
Circle In MonkeyShines – Winter 2022
Introducing Bindle #1 – Summer 2023
Bindle Zine #2 – Winter 2024
The 60 Degrees Girl Group Christmas Show
The Christmas In Connecticut Delivery Woman
¿Dónde Está Santa Claus (& Augie Rios)?
March Of The Wooden Soldiers: 10 Things You May Not Know About This Holiday Classic
Yes Virginia, There Is A Spotify Playlist
A Christmas Without Miracles: The 1987 Motown Xmas Special
Pride Parade (2011)

Pride Parade, 2011

I don’t focus much on poetry these days, but I did have a few pieces published in Vice Magazine back in the mid-90’s. That wasn’t the Vice Magazine of today, but a NYC free gay bar rag that tried to aspire to something more cultural than Next or HX by featuring poetry and art photography.

Tasteful nudes, of course.

There was even a centerfold.

I still have some of them stored somewhere.

But I digress: they published a few of my poems. One day I’ll post them.

This piece was originally written for a class at The Writer’s Studio in the Fall of 2011. I was frustrated with the assignment and with what I had come up with. I thought it was crap and made some disparaging remarks about it before choosing a classmate to read it aloud. And as the words hit the air, I started to realize that it was really moving. And important. And it was really effecting the others in the room. People got a little verklempt. And there was silence when it was over. And then a classmate spoke up and said, “I hate you. If that’s what you come up with when you’re not feeling the assignment. I really hate you.”

The lesson I learned: just as you should never apologize before an audition (regardless of any ailments or trauma in your life), do not discredit your own work before presenting it.

So here it is, posted without further comment…

(I did not take these pics, btw)

Gay Pride

Pride Parade, 2011

The parade of pride and fabulousity follows the purple stripe downtown –

guiding the way to gay ground zero: Christopher Street,

where it reaches its zenith, then dissipates into the side streets and alleys.

 

The air is electric – more than any celebration in recent memory.

The mood victorious as the decision was passed down late last night:

We can get married in New York today.

thank you cuomo

Mylar streamers and cardboard cutouts adorn the floats – trailers and pickup trucks

glittered up like drag queens for a day – back to work tomorrow, like the rest of us.

An explosion of g-strings and dykes on bikes and topless transgenders

and she was a he and that one I’m not sure – all making their way down 5th Avenue

to the anthemic disco beat of  I Was Born This Way.

 

On toes, I am balanced on a square inch of stoop at Barrow Street –

holding on to the railing, vying for a better view.

Next to me babies in rainbow bibs and bandanas

clap and giggle in the arms of their two mommies.

pride police

Police line the barricades with bemused smiles of “tolerance” –

steps away from Stonewall, and the confrontation that started it all-

their opinions now suppressed and stored for a private audience at a later time.

 

A weary drag queen sits on the curb, shoes in hand, wilting in the summer heat.

From windows and rooftops, cheering crowds toast

with their brunch Bellinis and Bloody Marys.

On a 5th floor perch at the corner of Bleecker, a man with confetti blesses the crowd below.

NYCPride-104

We walk this parade route, sharing sidewalks with ghosts, both living and dead:

There are no monuments to that lost generation of artists.

The survivors, no longer emaciated – saved by their cocktails.

These muscled torsos on spindly legs walk with the gait of wounded birds.

Their weary eyes and sunken cheeks tell the history more freely than their mouths.

 

We forget what it was like to be so scared.

 

Making our way down Christopher, herded like cattle to the street fair on Hudson.

Promotional tents for film and TV; samples of snacks and fruity drinks –

with acceptance comes the term “marketable demographic” as the former pariahs have

deep pockets and money to burn.

streetfair

Booths for dating services, pet care and enterprising wedding planners – a first!

A Wheel of Fortune carnival game: step right up and win some porn!

Stickers and posters advertise the Real Housewives of No Place Real.

Underwear-clad go-go boys flirt as they pass out condoms and lube.

 

Young lovers embrace – that overwhelming first love. Out in the open for all to see.

Too young to have known the fear, the loss, the magnitude of the shame.

Celebrating side by side with those old enough to remember

when the bullied and beaten didn’t ask why, and didn’t tell.

They took what was given – they were told they deserved it.

With words and in silence in one hundred different ways.

after

 

Now we know better.

And the world is not perfect on this day,

but we are closer now than we have ever been before.

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See Also:
Bindle Zine #1 – Summer 2023
Bindle Zine #2 – Winter 2024
Zombie Divas
Circle In Monkeyshines: Winter 2022
The Tin Man & The Lion: Unanswered Prayers
The Lion In The Emerald City: Promise Of A New Day
1991: Homo Alone
Debbie At The World (1989)
We Got Hitched
Sunshine & Tinsel: A Canine Christmas Tail